Posted 4/30/04 Julie, My name is Jimmy and here is my story. I have been married for almost 7 years. When we were first married, all we talked about was sex. It was fantastic. After our second child was born, sex stopped. She did not want to talk about it, she was not interested in it and most of all, she wanted me to leave her alone. I tried everything, the more frustrated i got, the more upset she got. She just lost her sex drive and always was tired. Your abbreviation is so right, Tired Wife Syndrome, she was always tired. So one night I picked up a copy of the Creative Loaf in Atlanta and read the adult section. I was so scared, I kept it in my trunk for a week. One day, I was home alone and I got the nerve up to call a few escorts. I sure wish I knew you then, I would gladly paid you for an hours time to teach me how to get started with escorts. I was so scared and so nervous of being caught by my wife. Well the first few escorts I called, all wanted my personal information for screening. I was too scared. Then I called this older escort who was really kind and warm. She talked to me and she could tell I was nervous. I made an appointment for the next day during lunch. I remember that night, I could not sleep all night. The next day my co-workers could tell I had something on my mind. I was watching the clock. As we all left for lunch, I headed to a mid-town apartment to meet my date. She was very pretty, a little older than I imagined, but was very professional and kind. The hour went so fast, but i was very relaxed. I thought about seeing her on a regular basis, but I got nerve up to start to call other escorts and here I am 2 years later, still seeing escorts about once or twice a week. I am still happily married and my wife is still just as tired as ever, but i let her get all the beauty sleep she needs. |
Posted 4/30/04 Julie, Here is my story. I am married to a beautiful women, a great mother of our children and wonderful friend. I am 40 and feel like I am at my sexual peak. I constantly think about sex! I am frustrated with my wife, it was not until tonight that I saw your post on Bigdoggie and realized i am suffering from T.W.S. My story did not turn out like most. I started seeing escorts that I found on Eros and other escort sites. It became a hobby in a hurry. I went from one escort to another. It was thrilling, it was fun and it was expensive. What I did not know is that my wife knew all along that I was seeing escorts and never confronted me. Our sex life became non-existent. That was ok, she was a great mother and wife, other than sex. I became confident and started to call from home, even using our family credit cards, still she acted like she did not know anything was wrong. One time I lost my underwear at this escorts apartment and came home with no underwear on. She knew I left than morning with my boxers on. While I was out having fun, my wife was at home, never really went anywhere, did not work, always working around the house or going to lunch or shopping with the ladies in the neighborhood. One day I made this appointment to see an escort in the afternoon. I always made up stories why I would be home late, but my wife always said she understood. I had made an appointment with this new, young escort and could hardly wait. I left work and told my boss I would be back late but I would stay late. I left work and headed to this escorts apartment, when I arrived, no one was home, I waited about 30 minutes, called three times from my cell phone, I guess she stood me up, so i did not want to go back to work and have everyone ask me why I am back so soon, so i decided to stop by the house to grab a quick bite to eat and then head back to the office. When I walked in, the music was on real loud, I will never forget, the stereo was playing Melissa Etheridge. I walked into the master bedroom, the door was slightly open and could not believe my eyes or ears, my wife was on her back and moaning like I have never been able to get her to do, and there was my neighbor, Lisa going down on my wife. I was so shocked, I did not know what to say, so i quietly left and went back to work. My co-workers all asked what was wrong, they said I looked like a deer in headlights. I did not mention anything to my wife that night, but a few days later, we were driving in the car and out of the blue she said, Honey, I know you came home the other day, I figured if you were seeing all those escorts, you would not mind if I have my own friends. Our marriage has been much better, I still see some escorts and she still sees some neighbors, but next time you think your wife is sleeping, you might want to check again, she might be awake, just keeping her eye's closed. Julie, keep up the good work, my wife and I plan to make an appointment with you for a "couples workshop." She actually is the one that suggested it. Name Withheld |
Posted 5/1/04 Julie, I found your column in Wildside Magazine. I picked up a copy at a local Atlanta area Inserections. I started looking for a escort or spa and came across your "ask a swinger" column. I started to e mail you and then purchased a phone session from you. It was great. Then tonight I see you are adding a section on "Sex Topic of the Week." This is one I wanted to add my two cents. I have dealt with T.W.S. for a long time. I had never heard that saying before. I come home from work, ready to have sex and my wife is always tired. She has a full schedule but never makes time for sex. I have wanted to see an escort for a long time. For the longest time, it never happened. I just did not have the courage to go through with it. Then I was searching the web and came across a website that listed some escorts. They used terms like, GFE, PSE and BBW. I had no idea of what these terms meant, I certainly had never heard of TER or Big Doggie before. Most of the ladies listed were only available for outcall. I did not think it would be a good idea to bring an escort to my home, so I found a nice looking escort that seemed very down to earth and called her. She offered in call service. Her apartment was only blocks from my office. I made the appointment and went to visit. When she opened the door, she was pretty but much larger than I expected. I did not want to hurt her feelings, so I went in. She was so pleasant and nice, but very large and I am not exaggerating, she was at least 100 pounds overweight. We spent a quality hour together and I left to go back to work. She sent me a thank you e mail after our appointment. I visited with her off and on for about 5 months till she moved away. Since that time I have seen at least 15 escorts all over the country when I travel. They are all very beautiful and thin, have great work out bodies, but none compare to my first encounter. I learned one thing about this hobby, personality and attitude is so much more important than height and weight. Leonard P. |
Posted 5/2/04 Julie, Thanks for offering this area to vent. My story is a little different, but I need to tell someone. I met my wife a few years ago. We were married after about one year of dating that included great sex. After the honeymoon, he sex drive diminished and her drive advancements in her career took over. She started working 12 hours a day, 6 days a week. No time for sex, no time for love and no time for intimacy. I was lonely and did not feel right about having an affair. I tired a few escorts and it was fun, but not fulfilling. I tried cyber sex but again, i was not fulfilled. Then i decided to visit an adult store. I noticed several well dressed men coming and going into the private booths. I decided to give it a try. I thought that they were watching adult videos and masturbating and going back to work. I took out a few singles and followed the crowd. There was about 12 small doors in a row. I went into booth number 4, ( I will never forget seeing that number over the door). I sat down, undid my pants and put in my dollar. I then noticed two large holes in the walls on either side of the chair. As i started to stroke myself and feel good, i noticed the guy to my left watching me, then he put his finger in the hole to motion me over. I went over to look and he put his tongue in the hole. He whispered to stick it in the hole. I was speechless, all I could think about was that I have never been with a man, I am 100% heterosexual. I fought the urge, but i was so horny and I started to think with my small head. I rationalized that a mouth is a mouth as long as i don't see who is on the other side. After thinking and thinking, fighting the urges, I slide my cock all the way through the hole and closed my eyes. What I was about to experience changed my life. I had never experienced a better BBBJ in my life. It was incredible. It was wonderful. At that point all i could think about was being on the same side of the wall with that man. After I exploded in his mouth and he swallowed, I regained my composure, dressed and left. All night, that is all I could think about, my wife rolled over a few times and asked me what was on my mind. I told her that I was thinking about what I had to do the next day during my lunch hour. The next day I went back to the adult book store, looking for another wonderful experience. I picked a booth, undressed, stroked myself and waited. This time things went crazy. This young guy, about 23, walked in the next booth, I got a peak before he closed the door and it got dark. I was expecting him to take care of me just like the guy yesterday. Within seconds, he pulled down his pants and slide his long, slender cock through the hole. I did not know what to, I have never touched another man's penis. I thought fast, my head was spinning, then I started to think about all the times my wife gave me a BBBJ when we first met. So i closed my eyes and slid his long slender cock into my mouth, within seconds i was sliding up and down on his cock. It actually felt wonderful. Lucky for me, without notice, she shot off, so I did not have time to think about allowing him to cum in my mouth. It was really nice and I swallowed and he pulled out and got dressed and left. I regained my composure, dressed and went back to work. I have since found that I also like men, so i now consider myself bi-sexual. I have even had a few dates with male escorts. I hope you don't mind this post, but i wanted and needed to tell someone. It is great to be able to tell you my story. It is like a anonymous confessional service. Thanks again, Name Withheld |
Posted 5/3/04 Julie, Thanks for allowing me an opportunity to tell the world how great you are. Yes, I am a client. I have been happily married for many years. My wife and children are my life. I am a successful professional and wonderful husband and father. My sex life with my wife and I is very limited. Although we consider ourselves swingers. It seems like the only time we have sex is when we come home from visiting a swing club. We don't play much at these clubs, but we like to watch. I guess you could call us voyeurs. A few months ago i was surfing the web under swingers and found you site. You are the most incredible women I have ever met. Trust me, i have seen thinner, taller and larger women, but none are the complete package like you. I am not sure what it is about you, but we communicate when we are together, you really listen to what I have to say, what is on my mind. You seem like you genuinely care what is on my mind. That is one of your greatest assets. You have really rounded out my life. You make me feel special. On your advice, I have really tried to improve my marriage, rebuild our sex life and spend quality time with my family. I no longer get frustrated begging my wife for intimacy. You really are a life saver. Can't wait to see you again. Name Withheld for obvious reasons. |
Posted 5/4/04 Julie, Just a note to let you know how much I love your site. You keep things so professional. My wife has this problem, T.W.S. , she always is tired. She sleeps a lot. She is overweight and works a full time job. So needless to say, our sex life is almost nonexistent. I also read your column in WildSide Magazine each week. You are incredible, but I must say, what I admire about you the most is that you are happily married and proud of it. So many of the ladies I meet are married but either talk about their S.O., like I don't know they mean their husband or they are unhappily married like most of their clients. You bring a breath of fresh air into this profession. I purchased a phone session with you in January after suffering from 5 years of T.W.S., and your advice has really helped. Although i did compromise, our sex life is much better. You were right, learn to do what pleases you and stop worrying about pleasing your spouse. I masturbate more often, I accept my wife's "quickies" for what they are worth. I no longer wait for the "evening event", I learned to appreciate the time we do have together. I look forward to our next phone session. James B.
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Posted 5/5/04 Julie, I have T.W.S., yes, she is constantly complaining about being tired. She was never like this before we had children. I fought, I begged and I prayed, but nothing helped. Our sex life went down hill in a hurry. One day I was surfing the web and found a escort site in my town. I contacted the agency, set up a appointment and was terribly disappointed. Yes, the agency is a rip off. I rented a room, the lady showed up, looked great, came in, checked my ID, then sat on the end of the bed and started to talk. When I asked her if she would like to get undressed, she said she is not that kind of girl, that the agency said she was just a companion. I was devastated. She then started to ask me what I wanted. I told her I wanted a nude massage. She then said she had never done anything like that before, but if I wanted to tip her, she might be able to try. I asked her how much, she said $300, Julie, I had already paid the agency $200 for the appointment. I was horny, thinking with my small head, so i paid her. She then dropped out of her cloth faster than you can say, " first time?". She had several large tattoos, pierced nipples and belly button. So much for Rebecca of Sunny Brook Farms. The evening was nice, but rushed. I have since learned to stay with independents and away from agencies. If I ever get to Atlanta, I will be sure to call you. I love the idea that your services are all inclusive with no tipping expected. Thanks for listening. Jim B. |
Posted 5/6/04 Julie, I love this topic, Yes, my wife has T.W.S. I am a regular poster on TER. I saw your post and had to see what it is all about. You are definitely different than most providers I meet. I guess I will have to upgrade from seeing providers to seeing a coach. Keep up the good work. Looking forward to next months topic. A Regular TER Poster |
Posted 5/8/04 Julie, I live in Florida. I found your site on the web. You are awesome. I care for my wife of 7 years, but as the saying goes, she has lost her sex drive. She only cares about family, shopping and entertaining. She does not seem to care about our relationship. I love her and never want to divorce her, but I have a high sex drive, so I started searching the web for escorts in my area. I started to see a few local ladies and really enjoyed my time with them. This one time I found a lady on line who did not have many pictures on line. I arranged a session with her at a local motel. Turns out that I know this lady. I went to high school with her. When I arrived, I took one look and realized that we knew each other. I always thought she was really cute in high school. She is such a nice girl. I was afraid I would feel uncomfortable since we know each other and my wife also went to school with us. Guess what, it was the best session I have ever had. She was so sweet, I have since been back for several more appointments. She was so cool the way she just laughed about what a small world it is. John S. |
Posted 5/8/04 Coach Julie, This is great, I have wanted to tell someone my story for a long time. Can you imagine what it is like not being able to tell anyone about your experiences with an escort. Julie you rock! After 10 years of marriage, my wife just gave up on sex. I just quit asking. I found a young lady advertising in the local alternative newspaper. She is awesome. We set up a date, that turned into another date and now I see her one afternoon a week. I have a standing appointment for 2 hours each week. We have gotten to know each other really well. I think we both are dependant on each other, but for other reasons. She counts on my weekly donation and I count on the intimacy. It has worked well until two weeks ago. My wife asked me if i was seeing someone. Seems she called my office the last 5 thursday afternoons and they always say I am out of the office, but when I come home I never mention anything about being out of the office. I figured I had two choices, I could lie to my wife or tell the truth. I told her the truth and said that I gave our marriage my all but when it came to the bedroom, she seemed less than interested. I expected my wife to lose it and really let me have it. To my surprise she calmly said, I wish you had the courage to confront me and tell my what you planned to do. I asked if she was mad or angry and she responded that if she found out that I was having an affair at work, she would never be able to get over it. Since it was a paid escort, she understood. Her rational seemed to be that an escort is like going to a sex doctor. I am very lucky, since I did not expect my situation to turn out this way. Name withheld |
Posted 5/9/04 Dear Julie, My name is Sheila and I hope you don't mind that a wife is writing in to your site. I have been married almost 25 years. I feel we have a wonderful marriage but we were married young and had limited experiences in the bedroom. My husband is a wonderful man and I wanted to give him a gift for his birthday that he will never forget. I hired him an escort for his 45th birthday. I will never forget that night. It took me almost 2 months to save up for the escort and 3 weeks to plan the special night. I found the most wonderful women you will ever meet. I let her know my plans. I told Jack that I wanted to take him away for the weekend. So on Saturday night we left the kids with the sitter and headed downtown to a 5 star hotel. We checked into our suite, left our overnight bag, dressed and headed down to the bar for a drink. My hired escort was at the bar having a drink. ( all prearranged by me) I noticed my husband took a double look of this beautiful lady. I slipped an extra key to the escort. We then headed for the restaurant and enjoyed a beautiful candlelight dinner. Then I suggested my husband go to the room while I went to the gift shop to pick up a few last minute things. I think my husband thought I was headed to the car to get his present since I purposely left a wrapped package in the trunk. I watched as Jack entered the elevator. I only wish I had a hidden camera when he opened the door to our room and then entered the bedroom. There, laying across the bed wrapped in nothing but lingerie was my hired escort. My husband was shocked. She acted like he entered the wrong room. She later said Jack's face was like a deer in headlights. She invited Jack to join her. About 25 minutes later I went up to the room. I opened the door slowly to hear Jack moaning. I walked in like I was in shock. Jack jumped up so fast I thought he was going to fall off the bed. He started to try to explain that this lady was lost and was in the bed when he arrived back to the room. I said, don't let me slow you down, keep going. Jack was not sure how to act, but when he noticed me taking off my clothes he realized that this lady was his birthday present. I have never been with a women before, but I know that Jack has a two girl fantasy. I took the " Just Do It" approach. I climbed into the bed and started to go down on this lady. She returned the favor and Jack will never be the same. Julie, Jack says he wants you in his bed for his next birthday. Sheila K. |
Posted 5/10/04 Julie, You are my ATF. I have seen several escorts in my life, but you are the first Sex Coach I have seen. You offer the sexiest GFE that I have ever experienced. I just wanted to drop you an e mail and let you know that I am also a happily married hobbyist. My wife and kids mean the world to me, but I am left unfulfilled at home. I have asked my wife to help me improve our bedroom time, but it has not happened, so i found you. What more can I say. I do want to mention that your intimacy advice has helped to improve the quality of our family life. I am now living a wonderful life, I have a great wife, wonderful children and an understanding coach. What more can a man ask for. You know who. |
Posted 5/11/04 Sex Coach Julie, I know you are going to think I am making this up, but here is the name and phone number of the spa that this took place at. ( name and number withheld) Here is my story and then you will know why I am still happily married after 17 years. My husband is a wonderful man but not good at covering his tracks. I found that he was leaving work early for lunch one or two days a week. I asked around and no one at work knew why. I noticed he was withdrawing $200 two times a week. The money was not the problem, he earns a great deal, but I was curious what he was up to. Then one day I put two and two together, he was going to a spa. I started watching the parking lots of the local spa near where he works. I found the spa he was visiting. That night I brought up the conversation about " is it ok what each of us does in our lives?" My husband said, as long as he was not having an affair and was brining home the bacon, that is all that should matter to me. So I asked him if those rules applied to me as well. He said he did not care what I did. I thought about this for a week. I went from being upset to wanting to get even. Then I decided what is good for the goose is good for the gander. I got up my nerve and went to the spa he visits and asked about a job for one day. The ladies thought I was nuts. I explained to them that I was writing a story about the spa industry and wanted some experience. They agreed. I went to the spa the next day, worked the front desk, cleaned up, I had not planned on seeing any clients, just being there when my husband came in. He did not come to the spa that day, but they got real busy around 4 pm and asked me to attend to this nice gentleman. I was so nervous. Actually it was really exciting. I not only made $100 but he left me a $50 tip. At the end of the shift I asked if i could come back, they were happy since this man said I gave him one of the best sessions he had ever experienced at that spa. I came back the next day, one of the ladies called in sick. I actually saw about 4 men that day, all left happy and most left me a nice tip. I did this for three days, it was really fun but I was getting tired. On the fourth day, it happened. Just as I was headed to a room with this young gentleman, my husband walked in. I said " hello" just as if he was a customer and not my husband. As I turned to go into the room, I took a quick look back to see my husband looking like he just saw a ghost. I made sure this client had a good time and got my hair really messed up. We finished our session in time for him to leave before my husband's session was finished. When my husband left, I made sure and say " have a nice day." When I got home, he did not say a word. I showered and started dinner. He was speechless. It took two days till he decided it was time to talk. We turned it into a really erotic conversation and this little experience gave our marriage a shot in the arm. I loved my weeks work, plus I made over $1,000. I know this sounds crazy, but I guess I am a wild and crazy girl. Candy |